Many schools (especially Secondary Schools) are incorporating mentoring and coaching into their pastoral provision programmes. Given the diversity of people in a church, a congregation will often have a number of people who could support pupils as mentors. Men who are willing to offer as a mentor are usually particularly welcome in the predominantly all-female environment of many primary schools, also recognising that a significant proportion of boys have no father in their home environment.
Some employers will allow employees time out of work to be a mentor at a local school, particularly if the company also has a link with the school. Although volunteers might naturally veer towards the mentoring role, there is a need for coaching as well.
Mentoring focuses on supporting a pupil as they explore their values, gifts, hopes and dreams, and is important for raising their self-esteem and confidence and keeping them focused on their achievement at school. A mentor is often important as a role model. Coaching is more task oriented and relates to specific help that a pupil needs.
Both mentors and coaches are required to listen and ask questions rather than just give advice and answers. Building a sound relationship with the pupil is vital to gain their trust and confidence. Many pupils have little experience of relating to an adult apart from immediate family and figures in authority, like teachers or the police. Learning to make such a relationship takes time. Some pupils might have low levels of self-esteem, therefore encouragement but also clear challenges and goals are needed.
Coaching requires giving feedback, but is more than that. Pupils often learn more from being asked how well/badly they did rather than being told where they succeeded or failed. The role of the mentor or coach is one that requires dedication, time commitment, good skills of listening and insight.
Schools are usually able to offer training and advice for people who volunteer as mentors.
Mentoring is the process of gaining wisdom from, and tapping into, the experience of others. We all have mentors - heroes, people we seek to emulate, people we've learned from. The rewards are immeasurable.
To flourish or not to flourish that is the question... Imagine - a farmer sows some seeds... they germinate and beginning to grow... he nurtures them into plants... one grows to 10cm and the others to 200cm... the reason...most were planted in the correct soil environment but one was left in its pot to become root bound. Mentors can help to ensure that the right growing environment for the pupil is created and sustained.